Early January I remember reading a spirituality-related article about the course for 2016 and it stated clearly, it was going to be a year of Transformation. I took it to heart. And thus, started 2016 with optimism and excitement. There were goals to accomplish; thoughtful intentions set; a specific frame of mind brought to focus; and deliberate choices made to stay optimistic and work hard to overcome any adversity the year would send our way.
And send adversity it did! 2016, the last 6 months of it has been nothing short of emotionally, mentally, and spiritually draining in a pretty brutal way. Through it all, here’s what I’ve learned:
Eat the donut
I get it, you’re eating healthy. You’re eating paleo, low-fat, no dairy, etc. But sometimes you’re going to crave a donut, a cookie, a potato chip. Eat it. Savour it! Enjoy it and go back to “as you were”.
Let It Go
This probably isn’t what you think. It doesn’t mean letting go of negative thoughts or anything that philosophical. This is coming from a place of burnout from my professional and volunteer commitments. I haven’t been happy to be there, excited about the mission, or eager to participate actively in a long time. Over the past few months, I’ve toyed around with the idea of moving on. And it wasn’t until Bruno died, I realized life was too short to be committed to something I didn’t really care about anymore. I’ve finally made peace with moving on, determined I’ll find something else to commit my time to while contributing to the greater good.
Be kind & be fierce
“Please”, “Thank You”, “Excuse me”, are still magic phrases. Oh, let’s not forget, “Sorry”. I have to admit, I’m one of those over “apologetic Canadians” who over-uses the word for no reason other than to be polite. Crazy, I know. I’m not proud of it. Saying “sorry” all of the time made me feel meek and added to my struggles with letting go of guilt.
I’m learning to pepper “Sorry” with less frequency, only saying it when it’s appropriate and when I really mean it. I’ve also stopped using words like, “just”, as in “Just checking in…” to “I’m checking in….” And I’ve done away with, “I’m wondering if I could…please” to “Yes. I’d like that, please.” Being polite without sounding like push-over. I’m into it.
I’m stronger than i think
This surprised me the most. I am stronger than I thought I was. I’m going through some my darkest days, saddest moments, and greatest heartbreak. But somehow, underneath it all, I have my breath, determination, gratitude, and love. And that’s more than I could ever hoped for.